Online Counselling for Grief, Loss and Trauma
Support for when something changes how you see yourself, how you think, and how you cope
Hello and welcome,
Perhaps you’ve found your way here because you feel as though you’ve somehow lost yourself.
You might have spent years adapting to what others need — hiding parts of yourself just to feel like you fit in — constantly second-guessing yourself, overthinking decisions, or wondering why you feel stuck, lost, or overwhelmed so much of the time.
Or maybe you’re grieving something more visible: the death of someone important to you, the loss of a future you thought you were moving towards, or the end of a relationship that once felt central to your life. You might be carrying this alongside everyday life — noticing that while time has moved on, something in you hasn’t. The world expects you to adjust, to find your footing again, yet everything feels altered, heavier, and less certain than it did before.
You might also be arriving with a quieter sense of unease — feeling unsettled, disconnected, or heavy without being able to name exactly why, because on the surface, everything looks fine.
Much of my work sits in these in-between places, where grief and loss — including bereavement and other non-death losses — shape how we relate to ourselves and others — even when those words don’t seem to fit at first. Sometimes what shows up in the present has its roots in experiences that required you to adapt rather than be supported. Over time, this can leave a lingering sense of disconnection, exhaustion, or self-doubt.
Many of the people I work with talk about:
☑︎ feeling stuck — in their thoughts, in relationships, or in life more generally
☑︎ a deep sadness they can’t quite explain, or don’t feel able to share
☑︎ relationships that feel one-sided, effortful, or emotionally draining
☑︎ struggling to find their footing after a loss, even when time has moved on
☑︎ persistent worry about what others think, alongside a quiet fear of getting things wrong
If you’re neurodivergent or highly sensitive, this can feel especially disorientating. Grief or trauma may show up in ways that don’t match what others expect — intense feelings one moment, shutdown or numbness the next, heightened sensory responses, a need to talk things through repeatedly, or having no words at all.
Your responses aren’t wrong. They’re meaningful — even if they’ve never been properly understood or held before.
Online therapy with me offers a space to slow things down, untangle what’s holding you back, and gently explore what’s shaping your inner world — especially the parts that haven’t yet had words, or felt possible to share.
If you’re curious about working together, you’re warmly invited to get in touch — or keep reading to find out more.
Laurie Hole
BACP Accredited Counsellor offering online therapy across the UK from Poole, Dorset.
You might be:
Struggling with how you see yourself:
☑︎ Caught in self-doubt and never feeling quite good enough.
☑︎ Carrying the pressure to always hold things together, even when it feels too much.
☑︎ Feeling numb, flat or disconnected for no clear reason.
☑︎ Holding a quiet belief that you’re somehow bad, unlikeable or “too much”.
☑︎ Finding it hard to switch off, rest, or stop being busy.
☑︎ Relying on self-criticism to keep yourself going
☑︎ Wondering if you’re “too sensitive”.
I work with adults whose experiences of loss — past or present — have shaped how they relate to themselves, their feelings, and other people.
Who I work with
Finding relationships difficult:
☑︎ Caught in relationships that feel one-sided and emotionally draining.
☑︎ In complicated or distant relationships with your parent(s), including estrangement.
☑︎ Hiding how you really feel, worried you’ll be a burden to others.
☑︎ Wanting to help everyone else, but struggling to ask for help or care in return.
☑︎ Shutting down or feeling abandoned during conflict with people close to you.
☑︎ Feeling anxious in work or social situations, worrying about what everyone else thinks
Feeling overwhelmed or burnt out:
☑︎ Finding it hard to say no or to put your own needs first, often feeling guilty at the idea.
☑︎ Living with a constant sense of tension or pressure
☑︎ Struggling to name your feelings, or know what you’re feeling.
For some people, these experiences follow a specific loss — such as bereavement, relationship endings, or the loss of a future they were quietly orienting their life around.
For others, they’ve been present for as long as they can remember, shaped by experiences that required them to adapt, manage, or stay strong rather than be supported.
Therapy isn’t only for when something “big” happens.
Many of the people I support live with a constant knot of anxiety, self-doubt, or emotional exhaustion without a clear story for why — because outwardly, their lives look fine.
Others come following losses that are more easily recognised by the world — and some following losses that were minimised, misunderstood, or never fully acknowledged.
Whatever brings you here, therapy with me is a place where you don’t have to perform being okay.
Together, we make sense of the sadness, the emptiness, the self-criticism, or the sense that something isn’t quite right. We stay curious about what keeps repeating in your life, and what your feelings might be asking for, gradually creating more space for ease, clarity, and self-trust.
Over time, you may notice small but meaningful shifts — decisions feeling less fraught, relationships less draining, the knot of tension loosening, and a growing sense of being more present in your own life.
If something here resonates, therapy might be a supportive place to begin. You don’t need everything figured out — just enough curiosity to take one gentle step forward.
If you’re unsure where to start, I’ve written a practical guide on how to find a counsellor in the UK, including what questions to ask and how to know if someone feels like a good fit.
You’re welcome to book a free initial call, or read more about how I work to see if online therapy with me feels right for you.